Separation is Key

It was snowing today when I left class. There were tears. Although from twitter I am glad to know that it's not just my neck of the woods!

Remember this morning I mentioned that PerMa sent me this book?

Well as I mentioned I haven't finished i but I have already been applying some of the tactics of recovery and they have been helping! I'm going to start giving sharing somewhat regular tips as I come across them and they help me!

I've posted my favorite tips so far right on my bookshelf so I see the whenever I'm on my computer.

Tip #1- Separate your personality from your E.D.

Your E.D. will tell you one thing, whatever it is, it is a lie. It is wrong. It goes against your true values. It can only hurt you. Learning to separate your thoughts and beliefs from your E.D's is the first major step. Literally say out loud what it is telling you and then say the truth. Address it like a person. For me, the way I've been telling the difference is asking myself "would you tell someone else to do that?"

For instance, today I thought I should have a light lunch so I can eat a ton of crap at night and feel alright about it because I need the calories. Then I stopped, does that really make sense, would you tell anyone else to do that? Clearly it was E.D talking. Caitlin then said but I'm starving now and I need good fuel to make it through my afternoon class. I had a wrap with a lot more hummus than I normally use (which is not enough) a ton of baby carrots, cashews and raisins (both energy dense).

It completely filled me up without stuffing me at all, I was awake and alert through the afternoon and only just got hungry for an afternoon snack when I got back instead of sitting through the second half of class starving.

Apple and almond butter

For dinner I was inspired by Namaste Gurl ! I made some nooch pancakes, I followed what's on her blog but I added cumin and a handful of frozen corn to make them mexican!

I topped them with a bunch of mushed avocado, greek yogurt and salsa. I also had roasted red pepper and broccoli (o my I forgot how much I loved it, definitely back in the rotation!)

Now enjoying a sprouted grain english muffin with PB2 and dark chocolate chips and watching the newest House! I'm so behind on shows!

Peace!

Caitlin

Do you talk to yourself? I always have and now do even more... yes out loud no matter where I am, I whisper to myself in public.

What shows do you watch every week? I love House, Glee, The Office and 30 Rock. When I'm at home I also hit up Real Housewives of New York and Bethenney.

Weather=Cravings

The weather today has been absolute crap. It's been raining 98% of the day, it's as dark as when I went to bed last night and the wind nearly blew me away. It was 60 degrees yesterday... I hate the midwest = /.

Good thing I got veggies in at lunch with a big salad. Spinach, baby carrots, hard boiled eggs and peas (my new favorite salad thing) plus a brown rice wrap.

Weather craving #1 was a large cafe au lait from my school coffee shop

Chobani topped with craving #2- chocolate cherry granola

And for dinner there literally only one thing that was going to hit the spot. Pancakes. But unfortunately somehow they ended up tiny =(

Compared to a tablespoon

So I went nut butter crazy plus 1/2 banana from this morning, honey, fruit spread and a piece of pumpkin bread. I also had a little bowl of frozen peach slices for some nutrients.

I was actually still hungry after this so I had this plate and another handful of butter toffee almonds.

I've also had a piece of toast with PB2 and some dark chocolate and I'm getting hungry again! I really think I need to eat more earlier in the day, I have had MAJOR snack attacks the past few nights! I'm going to try and start bigger lunches and afternoon snacks and see what happens.

Peace!

Caitlin

How do you deal with crap-tastic weather?

When do you eat the majority of your calories for the day? Or do you feel you spread them evenly? I try to spread them evenly but I feel like my lunch is always too small just because I'm normally in a hurry.

Breakfast Heaven

Oh My Yum.

This was really good. Really Good.

Cinnamon Stuffed Chocolate- Banana Bake with Blueberry "Sauce"

Ingredients

2 tbsp Pancake mix ( I used Bob's Red Mill Buckwheat)

1/2 large banana

a ton of cinnamon

3 tbsp egg whites

2 tbsp milk of choice

1 scoop chocolate protein powder

1/2 tsp baking soda

a pinch of salt

1 Stevia packets

About 2/3 cup frozen blueberries

How To

Pre-heat oven to 320. Mix all ingredients except the blueberries together. Honestly, I just mix them directly in the ramekin. But if you mix them in a bowl, transfer the mixture to a ramekin. Bake for 15 minutes.

While baking put the frozen blueberries in a microwave safe bowl. You want to se frozen so the ice can make the "sauce" MIcrowave on high for about 30 seconds or until they are fairly mushy. *Optional, stir in another stevia packet to the blueberries*.

Poor blueberries over the bake and mmmmm your way through breakfast.

I also topped mine with coconut butter... highly recommended.

Note- If you have crazy busy mornings like myself, this can be mixed in advance and put in the fridge. I mix it right before I go to the gym and pop it in the oven when for when I'm in the shower.

Besides delicious breakfast bakes my morning also had a great interval bike workout. I've been doing two interval bikes a week instead of one because I haven't been doing running intervals on Monday like I used to, I'm worried about my IT band and though I would like to get faster, it's more important to not get hurt.

Plus *BRAG ALERT* my plank time!

=D

Peace!

Caitlin

What did you have for breakfast this morning?

Crazy Eights

**Did you see my post from last night? If not please, please go read it! Thanks!**

I had an amazing "I feel like a real runner" type of run this morning. According to my garmin I did 8.05 miles in 1:25... not too bad! However this is not including the stopping and starting of the garmin and all the walking I did between miles 3.5 and 5.

I had a un-photographed clif bar before I left.

It started great and then around mile 3.30 my um... lower intestine came calling. I found a public beach access and ran onto the sidewalk. I found a Subway who graciously let me use their restrooms. I was concerned however so I stayed on the sidewalk for some time.

Running seemed to be making the problem worse so I hit stop on my garmin and thought I would just walk all the way back. As I went on I started to run a little and realized I could so I ran about two miles on the sidewalk and then headed back to the beach.

I ran until my garmin hit 8 miles. I don't know how far I went in total. What I do know is that my last 2 miles were directly into 25 mile per hour wind with sand blowing at me.

I screamed

I cried

I growled

I swore... a lot

But I finished =D

Breakfast! I <3 Carbs

Oatmeal pancake with banana, peaches, almond butter, honey and cinnamon

Bananas fosters coffee... yum is what I have to say about that!

Peace!

Caitlin

If you're a runner how do you feel about the wind? I hate it, and after this morning everyone on the beach knows that as well

Share a crazy running/ bathroom story!

NEDA Friend

Slow paced morning for me... in a good way! One of my classes got canceled don't have class until 2 today but instead of trying to run around like a crazy person I'm letting myself be productive in a relaxed way because I know I have work late tonight again. Last night for dessert I had this new granola bar, it was good not phenomenal I probably wouldn't buy it again just because there are better ones!

When I finally got back last night I was starving and craving barney butter of course so I paired it with some baby carrots (and a few honey twists...duh)

I covered 13 random miles in 62 minutes on stationary bike this morning while reading some great articles in Self on pleasure diets and relaxation... great relaxing and energizing start to the day! Before I left I had 1/2 a banana with cottage cheese and cinnamon.

I came back for a MPPIAB with vanilla protein, topped with raspberries, chopped salted cashews and a little coconut butter blob

Sprinkled with some ginger and green/key lime tea

I just would like to mention for one second that this week is National Eating Disorder Awareness Week. I don't want to go into too much detail or statistics or anything but I will say that this is an issue that hits VERY close to home for me. You all are somewhat familiar with the disordered thinking habits that I have and am still overcoming but I will also say that I have a large familial pre-disposition to this kind of thinking.

The biggest point that I would like to make about ED's is that they are not a choice, they are a mental illness that cannot be helped. If you know someone suffering with any kind of severe ED (anorexia, bulimia, bingeing) or just from some disordered thoughts or habits the best thing you can do it give them a friend and encourage them to seek professional help.

There is a campaign for awareness this week on my campus and I've been seeing these all around, I love them!

Have a great day!

Peace!

Caitlin

Balance or Bust

Morning all! A quick recap of my morning and a recipe and then it's discussion time! Before my workout I had a pita with some PB2 sauce (too much water).

It must have do the job because I got in an intense interval workout on the bike! I'll start sharing in detail some of my planned bike workouts soon!

For breakfast I created a new MPPIAB!

Apple Pie MPPIAB

Follow MPPIAB recipe (found here)

Add 1/2 tsp vanilla extract to recipe

Toppings.

1/2 granny smith apple chopped, sprinkled with cinnamon and warmed in the microwave

1 tbsp ground flax

1/3 cup greek yogurt

~1 tbsp craisins

Really Good, like apple pie!

Alright, time for some real talk friends. Last night I found a blank journal that I've had for a while so I decided to write down some thoughts. One thing that ended up on the paper was to be more open and honest on the blog. The reason I started it was to share healthy tips with you while trying to apply them to my own life. I'll be truthful that I have a disconnect, I am well aware of what a healthy lifestyle is but I do not always apply it especially in terms of mental health. Wanting to live a healthy life is an amazing thing but it is important to recognize the line where a healthy habit can morph into disordered thinking.

Lately my largest problem has been worrying too much about balance. Having a balanced diet with variety is extremely important in terms of health to get enough nutrients and to me in terms of satisfaction! I have a tendency to over think this however. I "save" nut butter for an afternoon snack so I don't over do it, I'll omit fruit from my lunch because I might want it for dessert etc. This is disordered thinking.

My goal is to start having what I want at the time I am hungry. This doesn't mean that I can't plan in advance by packing lunch the night before but then I should not fall asleep thinking about what else I should have in order to balance lunch. I make healthy choices because I want healthy food. I would like to start realizing if I choose something healthy that is what I desire almost every time I choose what to eat, I like enough food that things will naturally balance.

In the book Operation Beautiful Caitlin talks about how your body does not reset at midnight. If I have peanut butter three times in one day I can balance it the NEXT day. The other person I look to is Bethenny Frankel who describes her body as "a bank account to be invested in differently each day".

I'm going to start today, wish me luck!

Peace!

Caitlin

Have you had any struggles similar to this?

What do you consider and how do you find balance in any aspect of your life?

Happy Valentine's Day!

I don't care what anyone says, I like Valentine's Day! I really am a holiday person, I like to get dressed up and have a reason to celebrate something and even though I am single who can be opposed to a day dedicated to celebrating love which is ALWAYS needed in the world? I encourage you to celebrate ALL kinds of love on Valentine's Day, not just romantic!


Last night I actually found a wonderful "V-Day present" in the give-take box on my floor!

Score! The only flavor left in the box was lemon zest which just happens to be my favorite! 

This morning I didn't even consider doing speed work for running, I may try on Wednesday for a moderate run or just wait until Saturday, I am currently pain free but sprints is not a good test. In place I warmed up on the bike for 15 minutes, did weights and mixed in plyometric drills. They are a great replacement for speed work because they jack up your heart rate and actually increase power and agility in general, it was an insanely good workout! Before I left had the standard 1/2 english muffin with cheese and fruit spread! 

So who else is enjoying a marvelous love breakfast for one?

  


Berry-Cherry MPPIAB
3 tbsp pancake mix (I use Bob's Red Mil Buckwheat)
1.5 scoops vanilla protein powder
1/4 cup egg whites (or 1 egg)
1 stevia packet
3 tbsp skim milk (or milk of choice) 
1/2 tsp imitation cherry extract 


~2/3 cup mixed berries
~1 tbsp shredded unsweetened coconut


Mix everything in a microwave bowl, add water if it you want it moister which I do! Microwave for 2-3 minutes and top with berries and coconut!

Add fake marshmallow fluff if desired =)

With a sugar cookie candle and some strawberry-vanilla black tea... I can feel the self love! 

Have a great day! Please if you are "alone" don't spend this day down and out, use it to focus on the loving relationships that you DO have in your life! 

Peace and Love!

Caitlin

Quitting vs. Being Smart

Happy Monday everyone! This morning I type to you after a good workout although not the one I had planned! I was going to do 2.5 miles of speed work and full body heavy weights. What happened was 1.85 miles of speed work on the treadmill, 1.5 on the elliptical and moderate weight higher rep strength. 

During my speed work my legs were not feeling good but I knew that if I stopped I would just be quitting too easily, then my knee started to hurt. I wanted to quit but I pushed a little further and the pain stopped, whew! Then it came back and I knew it was time to go to the ET. I'm sure the it's tight IT bands and quads causing my pain because I can feel it. I MUST start to make stretching more of a priority. I changed my weights just to give my body something different because that's what it was clearly asking for this morning. I don't like to not finish my runs since I signed up for the marathon but I have to tell myself that almost two miles is still a run and it's better to cut it short and not get hurt than to not be able to run at all!

Before I left I had

1/2 and english muffin with cheese and a little fruit spread

And when I returned I went for some amazing muscles repairage in the form of a 

MPPIAB!

Ah... we meet again my love =)

Chocolate this time with microwaved frozen mixed berries, about 1 T chopped walnut and a drizzle of sunflower butter 

With orange spice green tea... perfection

But Caitlin, how can you have breakfast without....

AH there it is! Craisins hiding mixed in with the batter 

Hope everyone is ready for this week! Countdown till spring break 26 days!

Peace!

Caitlin 

How far do you push yourself while working out?

Does your decision to call it a day depend on if your in training or not? 

MPPIAB

Oh no she did not.... Oh yes she sure did!

Remember last Sunday's post  when I went grocery shopping and said I was excited to try something with my Bob's Red Mill buckwheat pancake mix?

Well may I present to you.....

Microwave Protein Pancake in a Bowl!

Holy cowsicle am I excited about this and LOVING IT!! 

Buckwheat mix, vanilla protein powder, ginger, cinnamon, vanilla extract, stevia, blueberries, banana, greek yogurt, coconut butter 

How to for MPPIAB (Inspired but The Fitnessista)

3.5 tbsp pancake mix (I used Bob's Red Mill buckwheat)

1.5 scoops vanilla protein powder

1/4 cup skim milk

1/4 cup egg whites (or one whole egg)

1/4 tsp baking powder (probably not needed because of the mix but I wanted to make sure it would hold)

dash vanilla extract

ground cinnamon

ground ginger

1 stevia packet

Mix it all in a microwave safe bowl for about 3 minutes and top as desired

 PERFECT for college students who are dying for healthy pancakes! 

Had with strawberry vanilla tea 

If you are limited on time or supplies and are jonesing for pancakes, give this a try!

Also this morning I had 

Whole wheat bread with cottage cheese and cinnamon

before I went to the gym. I did intervals on the stationary bike (sort of like a HIIT workout). 15 minute warmup on random, 45 minutes of intervals and 5 minutes cool down. 

Have a great day everyone!

Peace!

Caitlin